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*ABYSSINIA HENRY*
D-day for Henry. The Commanding Officer of the 4077th M*A*S*H has received his discharge and is headed home. Unbeknownst to all, these are also Trap's final days at the camp. As no one knows this though, including Trapper, this is Henry's time to shine. Trapper and Hawkeye throw him a goodbye party, and even buy him a brand-spanking new suit for the occasion. Everyone then turns out for one last review by Henry.
Hawkeye: Stand up straight.
Trapper: I'm standing straight. The country's crooked. (Ep. Abyssinia, Henry)
Colonel Blake bids a final adieu to the place he has presided over for such a long time, and marks the occasion with a well-deserved kiss with Margaret. Something Trapper unsuccessfully tried when the two of them were caught in the supply tent together earlier in the war.
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| Some women just get all the luck! |
Saying goodbye to everyone was tough for Henry. However, the chance to go back home was all worth it. In his dashing suit, Henry boarded his private jet and started his journey back to the USA.
Sadly for all, Henry's plane was shot down over the Sea of Japan on his way home.
Trapper: Radar! Mask!
Hawkeye: If it's my discharge Radar, just give it to me straight. I can take it.
Radar: I have a message. Lieutenant-Colonel Henry Blake's plane was shot down over the Sea of Japan. It spun in. There were no survivors. (Ep. Abyssinia Henry)
Lieutenant-Colonel Henry Blake had passed away. Shortly afterwards, Hawkeye was given leave to Tokyo for 6 days R&R. (&R&R&R&R) Unlike in the past, he travelled alone, leaving Trapper behind to man the front so to speak.
Trapper: No More boom-boom. (Ep. Bombed)
With Frank now in-charge and Margaret at his right hand (no comment!), the 4077th was transferred into a real Army camp including "Reville" (Well without the inverted commas I'd be inferring that it sounded like the real thing!) being blown by Radar. Trapper was on his own with the two Majors and from all accounts, managed quite nicely without Hawkeye by his side.
Hawkeye: What did you need me for? You had Frank Burns, and trusty Trapper John. Champion of the oppressed and molester of registered nurses. (Ep. Welcome to Korea)
3 days into Hawkeye's disappearance in Tokyo, Trapper received the news he'd been waiting all war for.
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| The winning envelope please Radar. |
Trapper: Im going home! (Ep. Check-Up)
According to Radar, Trapper was so happy;
Radar: He got drunk for two days and then he ran naked through the mess tent with no clothes on! (Ep. Welcome to Korea)
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| Well I couldn't find a picture of a naked Trapper, so I've made do with the booze shot! |
When Trapper sobered-up after those two days of drunken nudity, he and Radar tried for 24 hours to contact Hawkeye and tell him the bittersweet news.
Radar: We couldn't reach you in Tokyo. We tried for 24 hours. (Ep. Welcome to Korea)
Being unable to reach Hawkeye due to an unlisted geisha doing the mile in 10 minutes and 8 seconds on his back, Trapper left the 4077th without any note for Hawkeye; but with a message for Radar to plant one on his best friends cheek.
Hawkeye: How could he leave without saying good-bye?
Radar: Well he waited around as long as he could.
Trapper left the camp that morning to take an early plane out of Kimpo (in Seoul).
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| I never got to say goodbye. |
Two hours later (Dont you just hate the Romeo and Juliet timing these guys have?), Hawkeye made his way back home in a rickshaw, the ride costing him $20.
Hawkeye: Hello honey, I'm home. (Ep. Welcome to Korea)
After ignoring Frank, he went to have a shower with his clothes on, where he heard the news.
Radar: He's gone Hawkeye. He got his orders. He's been shipped stateside.
Hawkeye: What?
Radar: Trappers gone, he got his orders. (Ep. Welcome to Korea)
Incredulous, Hawkeye asked if Trapper had left anything for him. His response was some male-bonding that was a little out of Radars league; especially when reciprocated.
Radar: Oh! Oh no! Oh, geez! (Ep. Welcome to Korea)
Dripping wet, Hawkeye stormed into Frank's new office, where Frank and Margaret had been discussing the latest shipping out of the 4077th.
Frank: I just wish Pierce had gone and McIntyre had stayed.
Margaret: Oh Frank, have you forgotten? The time McIntyre sedated you and shaved every bit of hair off your body?
Frank: Well he's still better than Pierce. (Ep. Welcome to Korea) In the midst of this fond (or perhaps not so) reminiscing, Hawkeye enters.
Hawkeye: I'm going to Kimpo to say good-bye to Trapper. (Ep. Welcome to Korea)
This request denied, Hawkeye bears his soul.
Hawkeye: I lived with the guy for over a year, he's my best friend.
Frank: You're exaggerating his importance.
Hawkeye: He was very important to you too Frank.
Frank: Oh? Says who?
Hawkeye: For over a year he kept me from killing you. (Ep. Welcome to Korea) Enter Radar requesting permission to pick-up Trapper's replacement; Captain BJ Hunnicut.
Margaret: Permission granted corporal. Oh, sorry Major.
Frank: Hm? Oh it's all right Major. Permission granted corporal. (Ep. Welcome to Korea)
Radar leaves, and Hawkeye follows with the intent to join Radar and hopefully, get the chance to farewell Trapper.
Hawkeye and Radar both eventually make it to Kimpo, with Hawkeye driving because,
Hawkeye: You drive like I spit! (Ep. Welcome to Korea)
While Radar went in search of the new Captain, Hawkeye went in search of the old one.
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| One of the most important occasions to wear a dress uniform. |
From the Stateside flight manifest Hawkeye discovered that Trapper had actually left 10 minutes before Hawkeye had reached Kimpo. (Damn that Shakespearian timing again)
Hawkeye: I missed Trapper by 10 minutes. 10 LOUSY MINUTES!!! (Ep. Welcome to Korea)
Here, Hawkeye meets BJ; Trapper's replacement. While the 3 of them had a drink, Hawkeye tells BJ about the past;
Hawkeye: You missed two of the greatest guys in the world though. Henry Blake was our CO. Henry was ok from the navel out in every direction.
Radar: He sure was.
Hawkeye: He never made it home. And I just missed Trapper John the guy you're replacing by 10 minutes. 10 minutes!
Radar: We tried to call you!
Although Hawkeye did miss Trapper on this occasion, we do have a fair idea of what he would have said to him.
Hawkeye: Thanks Trap
Trapper: What?
Hawkeye: You made it bearable. I was lucky. You were honest, and open, and let me lean on you.
Trapper: No charge. (Ep. Check-up)
Back at the camp, Frank and Klinger both tidy up the Swamp for BJ's arrival. During the clean-up, Frank finds Trapper's embroidered robe and floppy straw hat. Frank is well-pleased with the prospect of BJ joining the camp.
Frank: It'll be a welcome change from all the gut we took from those two smartskies.
Although Frank doesn't exactly get what he bargained for in BJ, he none the less finds a top-rate surgeon, and another great guy in him.
BJ: What say you ferret-face?
We've always known what kind of Place the 4077th was to those living there.
Trapper: There's no place worse then this! (Ep. Check-up)
Hawkeye: You heard of a military post? This is a com-post. ( Ep. Welcome to Korea)
To end Trapper's finale, I'll leave with what going back home would have really meant to Captain Trapper John Francis Xavier McIntyre.
Frank: McIntyre what is the meaning of this?
Trapper: Frank, does paradise need a meaning? (Ep. Bombed) *ABYSSINIA TRAPPER* |
